Friday, 10 June 2011
Two years ago today I was finally being relieved from the weeks and weeks of prelabour. I had lost focus of you and just wanted the pregnancy over.
On Wednesday 10 June 2009 I woke at around 2am thinking oh no I wet my pants, to then realise no hang on my waters may have broken. Went to the loo, and there seemed to be more than just wee, so put on a pad and when that got wet and I knew I wasn’t weeing I was sure my waters had broken, I figured somewhere up top since there was no big gush. Knowing I could be in for some wait I went back to bed to try and sleep, but was too excited about what was coming, little did I know what was coming.
At 3am contractions started slowly and nicely, by 4am they were no longer nice at all, very strong very regular, and I really had to stop and remember to breath. Knowing I still had some way to go I walked the house, sat on the gym ball in front of the fire, and just generally tried to keep moving. By 5am they were rather difficult to stand through. I knew though that each contraction was bringing me closer to meeting you, and really I was coping well, nothing was overly painful.
At about 7am things just felt different so I called Toni to let her know what was happening and then started trying to get hold of someone to mind Lachlan. After an hour of panicking thinking I would find no one and me thinking that I did not have much longer and desperately wanted to get to the birth centre I did get hold of someone. Dropped Lachlan off at 8:30am and then headed off to the birth centre in some decent Canberra traffic. I was sure things were really close and was not expecting to be at the Birth Centre long before it was all actually happening. I did not let Damien know my thoughts he seemed in enough of a rush and I did not want an accident, it was hard to be so excited but not tell him. We arrived at the birth centre eventually just after 9am I think it was a relief to see Toni and know that she was there when needed. Damien and I were left to do what I needed.
After a few hours and not having progressed as much as I thought I had I hopped in the bath for some relief. And well things almost stopped, but I did enjoy the rest and close to had a nap in the bath between the contractions that hurt a whole lot less in the bath. Think I was in there for about half hour, felt like longer, when I thought I should get out and try and get this actually happening, Toni may have suggested this but I don’t really remember. So got up and wondered around for awhile, knelt, leaned, crouched, sat things got very painful and very strong and I had more than had enough.
So at around 12:45 I re-enetered the bath and again contractions become less regular. I knew I needed to get back out, but I was starting to feel exhausted. I made several attempts, but the lack of the warm water kicked the contractions back in before I could even climb out. I did drag myself out after about 45mins.
At around 2pm I called Toni in for some help and Damien asked if I could use the gas. I was relieved that I was going to get some help with the pain. First though she ruptured my membranes which we had discussed earlier, and then set me up on the gas.
I spent some time on my hands and knees on the bed before my knees started to give way so flipped myself over onto my back and my goodness I HAD to push. Damien called Toni in and that was it, it was baby time. It was wonderful to have Toni there, someone I knew and could trust to get me through the last bit. I tried to move up into more of a sitting position, but I just couldn’t move I was stuck, and I just wasn’t able to ask for help. Every time I tried to speak I seemed to just cry and moan instead, I was so frustrated I could not get the words out that I needed to. So there I was stuck on my back trying to focus on getting bub out while knowing I was not in the greatest position. As Nanuq crowned he wiggled and squirmed his head it was a funny feeling. I wanted to push and get rid of the feeling but also wanted it to never stop, a sensation I will never forget. Toni asked several times if I wanted to touch the head, for some reason this is just not something I want or need to do. Eventually the head was out, then for the body. With Lachlan the body just followed, so I did a half arsed push to get the body out, nothing budged and I panicked. Was calmed down by Toni and asked to push again so I gave it all I had about 3 times I think who knows really could have been heaps more and out he came and onto my chest at 4:25pm, I almost pushed him away because I didn’t want the yuck on my shirt, LOL little did I know the bottom of my nightie was already soaked in yuck. Once he was there I didn’t care anymore and was just pleased to be holding my little boy. He just cried and cried and I couldn’t stop him, I felt terrible, but I still had work to do, had to get the stupid placenta out. My goodness getting that thing out hurt this time. Then it was all over, but the tear hurt like crap and I whinged like an idiot about it, wanted the gas but Toni took it off me (LOL Damien gave it back when she left the room). After a little bit I calmed down and didn’t need/want the gas anymore, so I popped Nanuq on the boob and he had a good feed. It was a relief to have it all over, and a joy to be holding my little baby boy. I may have ended up in the one and only position I didn’t want but it no longer mattered. I had my baby, and the birth was wonderful anyway, besides the pain and my moments of panic the birth was beautiful.
We decided to ice the tear until the OB could come and stitch me up, she turned up at about 7pm. The waiting was awful I just wanted it over, wanted a shower and just start settling with bub. He had a couple of feeds in the time we waited, Damien called my Mum and I messaged the whole 2 people I wanted to know. I was allowed the gas again as I was stitched up, I didn’t need it for the pain just to help me be a bit more out of it while someone had their face in my groin stitching up my second degree tear. Eventually got the shower after this and was finally allowed to eat. So at 8pm I ate my first meal of the day and boy did I eat, and ate all night. We stayed the night at the birth centre since we decided it was too cold to take bub home at night and Damien was way too tired to drive. We all got a little bit of sleep, all snuggled in the bed together since Nanuq did not want to be let go and after his day I do not blame him. Hearing test and baby checks the next day and we went home just after lunch. Igloo came into the birth centre to help bring his baby brother home and boy was he proud.
Toni came to check on us both at home on the Friday, it was after this visit that I fully realised how completely wonderful the whole pregnancy and birth was. To share the pregnancy and birth with the same midwife is great, but to also see them enjoy the bub they helped deliver is fantastic, it makes it all so much more special.
As I re-write your story you have officially been two for around half an hour, watching you read yourself a book, walking and talking and being a typical 2 year old. You are such a precious boy and I will love you forever, after the scare you gave us as a bub I know I am exceptionally blessed to still have you.